Confused

So I'm here thinking about you...

Should I tarry longer?

Or should I just take a bow?

It's been months of waiting...

Months of anticipation

What am I waiting for?

Who am I waiting for?

I ask myself 'Is this worth it?'

Isn't this me again chasing another shadow?

Why can't I just leave this behind me?

How easy could that be?

If it was a fling, it would have been fine

Life becomes hard when you begin to wonder if you really mean anything to some people

You so much want to be with someone who is happy with someone else

And you begin to wonder, why can't I just pay attention to other things

You wait at your phone, hoping she would call

You quickly read your new message, thinking she might be the sender

But no, she's far away...in a distant world

Maybe we are not meant to be

Maybe our worlds are miles apart

For months she's been away

And her absence has killed me slowly

Then faster when it dawned on me that I'm living in a fool's paradise waiting for her

That's the irony of life

Someone you love is in love with someone else

Someone else is crazy about you but you can't just let it be

I try to look elsewhere to find someone else but no other person makes me feel the way you make me feel

No one challenges me the way you do

Yes I love chasing you

I love the hunter experience I have when I know you are hidden somewhere and I have to find you

I enjoy reminding myself that you are multi-talented, independent, sanguine, beautiful and ambitious

I am proud of you as my friend

But when it dawns on me that there is nothing more, tears run down my cheeks slowly

I want something more between us

Something intimate and exclusive

Something that makes me feel I have someone, somewhere who thinks about me and feels the same way I feel about her

I want to hold you, look into your eyes and kiss you under the rain

I want to caress your body, grab your butts, suck your nipples and abdomen gently

I want to put those two fingers of mine into your supreme zone and hear you moan

I want you to grab me hard by my neck, your legs wrapped around my body, our bodies pressed into each other, my fellatio inserting softly into you as you cry my name with passion


Oh. What am I saying?

I got distracted I guess

What man wouldn't want to have a body like yours lying in his bed?

The truth is, I want to be your best friend, I want to be your lover.

Tell me NO and I will leave you forever...tell me otherwise and prove to me that you want me to stay

Don't be indecisive 'cos it's making me lose my mind